Recently, I was at the airport to receive someone. A fascinating scene unfolded in front of me as passengers picked up their baggage and met people waiting for them. A young lady, probably in her mid thirties picked up her bag and looked around for her loved ones. A gentleman of about the same age, went running by me to greet her. He swept her in his arms and hugged her. After a few seconds, they both took a step back and communicated frantically with each other in sign language. Then they would kiss and hug again...... and this went on for a few minutes. There was not a word spoken between them, yet there was so much said. I know its wrong to stare, but I couldn't help it. The silence of their greeting was deafening. As they walked past me, I stole a glance at the sticker hanging from their baggage and it read: "Hearing & Speech challenged".
Seeing them, I knew they cared for each other. Words, though important, are not always necessary to express your feelings in a relationship. Our actions, our eyes, our deeds can say much more than words at any given time. Being loud is not always convincing to get a point across. There's a common Sicilian phrase, that "The loudest person in a room is the weakest." I don't think this is always true, but an insecure mind does constantly seek attention. The only time we really need to be loud is when we defend our friends. As Martin Luther King Jr. said --"Hear no evil of thy friends, for after a fight, we don't remember the words of our enemies, but we do remember the silence of our friends."
It is important to be a good listener. The most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention…. A loving silence often has far more power to heal and to connect than the most well-intentioned words.
Silences make the real conversations between friends. Not the saying, but the never needing to say is what counts.
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