A few weeks ago, a very distraught young patient came to my office. I have known this patient for a while.
"I am very upset since the last few days," she said, wringing her hands.
"And why is that?" I asked
"One of my best friends is talking behind my back. Really, really bad things about me."
I didn't know what to say for a second.
"I'm sorry. I could give you a pill to relax you a bit," I said, hesitantly.
"No...no.. I don't want a pill. But you could help me," she said.
"Sure...sure. How can I help you?" I asked
"Well.. you could talk to her and tell her not to talk about me behind my back," she said.
"I...I don't understand...You want me to talk to your friend...?!" I was taken aback, to say the least. My voice trailed off.
"Its very simple. She is also your patient, actually all of my friends are your patients.And we really listen to you. When she comes to see you next, just tell her not to talk about me behind my back... but don't tell her I told you to tell her, because then she will know that I know----"
"Hold on...hold on... you can't be serious!" I exclaimed.
I'll leave the rest of the conversation to your imagination.
Gossiping is built in the human race's DNA. We all are a part of it, some more than others. The fairer sex is much more maligned regarding this topic, but that is unfair. We all know some men who could give the ladies a very stiff competition! A juicy piece of gossip travels on wheels, and is enhanced & polished by every mouth that it travels through.
Maybe I should have told the young lady in my office that somebody who talks behind her back is not really her friend, least of all a best friend. And to make her feel good, I should have added that people who talk behind her back, are exactly there. Behind her, and probably envious of her. People will mostly gossip about the important and popular amongst us. When was the last time you heard a juicy piece of gossip about a boring person?!
I have yet to come across a piece of gossip that extols the virtues of the subject. The way our societal structure is, trying to squash a rumor is like trying to unring a bell or like trying to put toothpaste back in its tube! But always remember one thing -- the person who gossips to you, will more than likely also gossip about you. Don't let your mouth be a witness to what your eyes did not see. The easiest way to keep a secret is to keep it to yourself.
"There is so much good in the worst of us,
And some bad in the best of us,
That it hardly becomes any of us
To talk about the rest of us."
~Edward Wallis Hoch
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